Flowers & The Trees.

Ever been around a toddler that learns a curse word? Sometimes they use it in context but sometimes they just throw it out in a random place within conversation to see what reaction their parent's give. Usually they do this because they know it's not an everyday word, the word has a "special" meaning, they're just not sure what.

Well, I'm afraid we had a case of the toddlers on our hands this evening. Take a read at what ensued.

"Mom, what are we having for dinner?", asked Macy.
"Oh, I'm not sure yet but I do know I need to go to the grocery store.", I replied.

Macy responded, "Well, sometimes I get nervous about eating other people's food."

"You get nervous about eating other people's food?" I asked, "What does that mean?".

"You know, like when we were at that chili thing at your work?" (referring to a chili cook-off I judged at my workplace), said Macy.

I thought, "Oh, you mean you don't like to eat in front of other people?"

She clarified, "No, like it makes me feel like when I have puberty ... like that."

"Makes you feel like when you have puberty??" At this point, I belted out a very boisterous laugh, I know. It was wrong, but I couldn't hold it back.

"What is puberty? I don't get it?", I asked.

"Then why are you laughing?", she said.

"Well, because I know what nervous is so I'm trying to understand how nervous equals puberty.", I responded.

"Well, I don't really know.", admitted Macy.

"Ohhh, where'd you hear that word? Maybe we could ask them to help us understand. Could we ask them? Who was it?", I pondered.

"Well, I can't really remember. I just heard the word.", I suppose she didn't want to fess up.

"Ohhhh, well. I believe I know what puberty means, I just wanted to know if there was a different meaning for it cause you called it the same as nervous.", I went on to explain.

"Puberty is when your body goes through different levels of changes somewhere between oh, 10 to 12 years old. You'll probably get zits, you'll get little boobies, you'll have a period--you know like when mommy has blood from her vagina & has to use tampons? That's a period. It happens one time every month. You will also get hair under your arms and on your goober."

She just looked at me like oh no you di'unt just sit there & say all that!

We both went from serious to busting up laughing.

"I said nervous was puberty!", she roared laughing even louder.
" Yeah, now you see why I laughed?", I asked.

"Gross.", Macy replied.

Fast As Fast Can Be, You'll Never Catch Me!

We had a small earthquake in Oklahoma yesterday. I anticipated Macy Walker would have one heck of a story on her account of the event; instead all I got was "Eh, it was no big deal." Well, okaythenma'am.

We went on to discuss much more important things, like ...

"Hey Mom, did you ever ding dong ditch when you were little ?",

said with a grin & slight laugh.

Me, baffled for a nano-second at how my precious, innocent, sweet little 7 year old baby already knew what ding dong ditching was, I paused only to quickly spit out,

"Ding dong ditch? What is ding dong ditch?", wasn't that the right thing to do?

Pretend I didn't know to see just how much she knew or would tell??

Shrug-Oh well, I sure thought so!

This time I got a bellowing, HA.HA.HA. as if she was thinking, you're so dumb-you know nothing-kinda laugh and

"It's where you go up to someone's house, ring their doorbell & then run off!"

"Ohhhh", I responded. "Well, what happens if it's a really mean person

and they run out & chase you??"

"Then I guess I'd just run really fast to our house and lock the door!",

followed by more laughter.

I kinda chuckled too this time because a.) I hoped she'd ding dong ditch someone who'd scare the bananas outta' her so she'd not do it again but also because b.) I still don't know how the heck she so accurately knew the ding dong ditch concept ... she's SEVEN for cryin' out loud!

I asked how she learned to do that and warned only to do it to people she knows (apologies to our neighbors in advance), applied the concepts of stranger danger, politeness, etc, etc. but didn't say NOT to do it ... Gimme' a break, we aaaaalll know she would do it anyway but the best part came shortly after.

"Well, you didn't do it but I BET Daddy & Jen Jen did!!!",

she & I both roared laughing.

She's right ;)